Alright, I'm not sure how detailed you want this critique though.

Something that generally helps with flat colour to help direct the eye is the inking. You've inked the characters as well as what they're touching, that's good. Inking shouldn't be on the background objects in my opinion. That will help leave the background objects as background objects.

The additional colour around the storm cloud helps differentiate it from the other clouds in the sky, but I find my eye having to search for it. To fix this, using different colours on the farthest right mountain could help pop the storm cloud out. To help also pop the storm cloud out, change the other clouds' colour and style or remove the additional clouds out of the scene entirely. The lightening shooting from the storm cloud is also blending too much with cloud itself. If it were changed to another colour (preferably yellow as it isn't used much there) it'd help draw the eye to that prop in the scene. You could, if you wanted, add things like yellow reflection off the cloud or whatnot.

I have other ideas as well, but it'd take a while to go through. If you'd rather, I'll take this and colour on top of it when I get home and do this for you instead of your request in my journal. It may work out better that way.

Well, it depends on what type of critique you are looking for, but I'll give it a shot. It's interesting to see what this storm might be that's coming!

If you wanted to improve this picture, the two main items you want to address is detail and shading. As far as shading goes, there really isn't any in this picture (what art program do you use?). Burning/shading/darkening the edges of each of the objects would help make this picture pop out more.

As far as detail, there's some places where you have the basic outline of an object, but you stopped there. For example, three of the clouds in the sky and the house in the background are just linework that hasn't been colored in. The lightning... doesn't really look like lightning, so you may want to find a reference and mimic that. There's some techniques to making the lightning look like it's actually glowing if you really wanted to go all out. If you really, really wanted to go all out, you could darken the entire image and have the reflection of the lightning bouncing off of your characters.

Just some food for thought for you. Hope this helps.

I did the whole thing in photoshop (cs2).
I know I need to go back and do some more shading / coloring fixing, and the lightening will be colored in yellow eventually too. (This is all one giant work in progress)
I found myself not wanting to add too much detail to the things in the background because I didn't want to detract from the focus of the picture, but I see what you mean there.

I am going to keep working on this one until I feel I've gotten it right. Thanks for the help.

--
What we do for ourselves, dies with us. What we do for others and the world, is immortal.
---
"I don't pray because I don't want to bore God." - Orson Wells

This whole thing is one GIANT work in progress. I've really only dabbled in coloring, so this is going to be a test of what I can actually accomplish. Thanks for the offer on the recolor, but if I don't try it myself, I fear I may never learn.

I know I have to go back and add some more shading / color fixing to many places. As for the lines in the back - like I said, this was a doodle that got a little out of hand. Originally there for depth in the B&W image, I just used them as guides for the different land colors. (sorta, note the clever lightening of the grass / mountains between characters. ITS SO CLEVER!)

I'm going to keep working on this until I've gotten it better, but the criticisms helped. I'll keep on this. Thanks.

--
What we do for ourselves, dies with us. What we do for others and the world, is immortal.
---
"I don't pray because I don't want to bore God." - Orson Wells

No problem. I was suggesting that I colour over it for you to help you compare what I might have done instead of me just telling you. No worries though, I'll stay off of it.